When you primed us for this one I was going to say I hope you wore a mesh tank top while writing it. I don’t know you like that. But after reading, I’ll say that I wouldn’t think any less of you if you did.
Glenn Danzig is only 5’3”?! How is that possible?! That’s like going to the ballpark and seeing Aaron Judge is built like Hack Wilson. That is wild!
Outstanding breakdown of this video. This reminded me, in all the best ways, of Good Movie by Shea Serrano. That’s not a comp I throw around lightly. Great work! 👊
Thanks much, Matt! I'm a huge Shea fan and did crib the idea of writing to specific minutes of the video. Made sense in this case. Happy with how it came out. 😁
No slight on Shea, this got me wondering if this format might work better for a video since you’re only dealing with a few minutes. Unless it’s Thriller or one of those classic GnR vids. And I’d be game for Zapruder film breakdowns on those as well.
Hope you do some more of these music videos. Made for a very fun read. My girls were asking me, “dad, what is so funny?!” Nevermind, dad just laughing at dad stuff.
One other bit of Danzig record fun. At the begining of 2024, someone on reddit figured out that if you ordered Danzig's "6.66 Satan's Child" album off of Amazon, you'd get a random record sent to you. Even better the Danzig album was only $12.00. Nobody knew why but it pushed the album to #1 on Amazon, temporarily knocking Taylor Swift down to #2. And people were getting good albums. I placed an order for two albums. Got a Sleep Token album which I gave to a friend who really wanted it, and a RHCP album.
So the explanation I read is that all the random records came to amazon already in their cardboard mailer, and for some reason they all got scanned in as the Danzig album. I like to think there were just bins of albums all labeled Danzig and really they were everything but Danzig. It was a fun week or so on reddit as everyone was posting their Danzig Roulette purchases.
Saw Samhain sometime in the early to mid-80s at the kennel Club in Philly with maybe 40 other people. So much batter than what followed. Sorry you missed it.
Epic! Thank you for this tremendous effort! All those memories came flooding back to me. This may be one of the best songs of the 90s, definitely one of the greatest vocals of the era, nd complete with that killer guitar riff I didn't appreciate enough back then.
Love every word of this....EXCEPT for when you state that Glenn is 5'3". Not cool, man. Not cool at all. It's obvious to anyone witnessing this magic that Glenn is a seven-footer, with a cosmic radius stretching to the heavens. I just hope Glenn forgives you for this grave error.
So glad you enjoyed it! I had so much fun writing it, huge nostalgia trip. Also a deep vein to mine. I actually cut jokes, there was so much to say.
I frankly was shocked to discover Glenn is so short. Wouldn't have known if not for people on Notes making jokes about his height. He absolutely projects as a big dude. Must be his stage presence talking.
This poignant piece of poetic WTF?! inspired me…to write an article about a painfully tragic frustratingly long battle with my parents, from my own adolescence, that nearly ruined my entire life (which at 14 years of age, is like, literally what it felt like.)
When they surreptitiously installed a complex 4 digit code system that blocked my sister and me from accessing the ONLY channel worth watching from our family’s extremely expansive, (I can only assume) expensive, home cable television package that had SO many other stupid and shitty channels that we were welcome to watch…and the there was a silent war that we fought against the enemy for years on behalf of our love for sex, drugs, and rock n roll. No…
Maybe not quite as bad but... when we were kids my dad got us an Atari and a small TV we could play it on, but never actually let us play it.
I shouldn't say never. I think we got to turn it on for our birthday and maybe even Christmas. Which is why we started playing when they weren't home. Honestly they brought it on themselves.
Not only that, but I no longer care about the blatant lies or awful threats they have made against me.
What are they going to do to me, really?
They’re 80 year old children. One will scream in vain and the other will remain tone deaf until death they shall part.
I won’t be around to watch the impending implosion, as they’ve already ripped apart pieces my soul that need substantial time away to heal and return to me as a new iteration of my next chapter.
All she did was read the Bible all day and scream at my hearing impaired Dad (who I don’t believe is legitimately hearing impaired) and he ignores her and does whatever he wants anyway. He actually left on Christmas Day to just get away from her. And he hates me for being born. So, he bounced without even a word. I was alone with it.
She does enjoy condemning everyone to Hell. I have been there forever, and it’s lovely this time of year.
But, when she condemned the grandkids there, too? One for “Living the gay lifestyle” and another for “Living in sin” - while simultaneously screaming JESUS in my face?!
At that moment - I couldn’t resist telling her I just sent more money to my favorite causes: Planned Parenthood and the ACLU. I had nothing to lose because I was never returning to this HELL ever again.
She snarled…and smugly told me that I deserved every awful thing that was coming my way. That I was a baby murdering defender of the “trans freaks.” My pulse rate quickened…. And then…She GOT PROPHETICALLY LOUD:
HER Bible says that Palestinian-born children MUST DIE for God chose Israel 🇮🇱!!!
I frantically scanned for the closest exit…
SHE then looked up at the ceiling, in what I believe was a state of euphoria, and (praying audibly?!) Yelled to no one in particular: “God Bless You President Trump! Lead us in the final battle against this evil beast that is The Whore of Babylon as she is sitting before me.”
And, that was my last Christmas 🎄 present to myself. I bolted like Usain to the front door, sweating like a whore in perimenopause, and started my German car (I did not know that a 4th Reich was actually going to be a “thing” when I bought it in 2022), and drove far away.
Yikes! Holy cow, this is so awful. You definitely "win" the worst stepmother award. And terrible dad too. Glad you are free of such negativity! Isn't it so freeing?
What kind of blatantly selfish, arrogant, pieces of shit parents did we have? I am outraged the anguish you and your brother endured - except on Christmas and your birthdays. 🎉
I remember our Atari. Kaboom? 💥 Wasn’t that the game that you moved the joystick from left to right in order to stop the bombs from exploding?
Talk about the 80’s, right? Hey, Russia might obliterate the US by way of Nuclear Holocaust. Let’s capitalize on that fear so Eric’s parents can have fun.
Dude! Kaboom was our jam. Favorite game to play hands down.
My Mom and stepdad are cool. Dad and stepmom were the problems. Eventually I realized I don't have to put up with it anymore, so I don't. Life's so much better now!
Kaboom 💥 to not having to do dysfunctional parent duty anymore! I dropped Dad and Evil Stepmother late last year and they might still be alive today. I wouldn’t know.
Because I don’t care either way.
It’s just that I finally embraced apathetic instead of pretending it’s all copacetic. Kaboom 💥
Primal Gen X tapping here. Xennials too as you say. Ahh the memories. My sister and I used to play MTV all day, VHS tape in, hitting record as every new video began. If it was a banger, we kept it in the compilation. If not, we rewound and waited for the next video. Getting the world premier of November Rain and Pull Me Under by Dream Theater just after Jump by Kriss Kross? Yes please. Those tapes still exist. It was my older sister who introduced me to Danzig via this video. I absolutely had to watch, she explained, cuz, and I'm quoting here: "ohmygod he is so freaking hot." I knew then and there I would never be an alpha male. And for the next few years, every time this song played anywhere, my best friend would scream the wrong words. To this day I don't think he knows that Glenn is gonna show her "my world" because said friend was always too busy screaming "power!!" during that line instead. Good times. God we're old.
When you primed us for this one I was going to say I hope you wore a mesh tank top while writing it. I don’t know you like that. But after reading, I’ll say that I wouldn’t think any less of you if you did.
Glenn Danzig is only 5’3”?! How is that possible?! That’s like going to the ballpark and seeing Aaron Judge is built like Hack Wilson. That is wild!
Outstanding breakdown of this video. This reminded me, in all the best ways, of Good Movie by Shea Serrano. That’s not a comp I throw around lightly. Great work! 👊
Thanks much, Matt! I'm a huge Shea fan and did crib the idea of writing to specific minutes of the video. Made sense in this case. Happy with how it came out. 😁
No slight on Shea, this got me wondering if this format might work better for a video since you’re only dealing with a few minutes. Unless it’s Thriller or one of those classic GnR vids. And I’d be game for Zapruder film breakdowns on those as well.
Hope you do some more of these music videos. Made for a very fun read. My girls were asking me, “dad, what is so funny?!” Nevermind, dad just laughing at dad stuff.
Yeah I'll probably do more of these. It was fun.
Right?!? I figured he was like 6’4 or something.
Yeah, any odds on him being less than 5’10 I would’ve taken a long look at. I guess if the camera can do magic for Tom Cruise it can do it for Glenn.
I am 99% sure I saw an album of Danzig singing Sinatra songs when I was out record shopping once.
That's wild! I want it to be true.
I was wrong but close. It's Danzig Sings Elvis. And yes, it's real.
https://www.discogs.com/release/15082465-Danzig-Sings-Elvis
One other bit of Danzig record fun. At the begining of 2024, someone on reddit figured out that if you ordered Danzig's "6.66 Satan's Child" album off of Amazon, you'd get a random record sent to you. Even better the Danzig album was only $12.00. Nobody knew why but it pushed the album to #1 on Amazon, temporarily knocking Taylor Swift down to #2. And people were getting good albums. I placed an order for two albums. Got a Sleep Token album which I gave to a friend who really wanted it, and a RHCP album.
Whoa that's crazy! Does anyone know why that was happening?
So the explanation I read is that all the random records came to amazon already in their cardboard mailer, and for some reason they all got scanned in as the Danzig album. I like to think there were just bins of albums all labeled Danzig and really they were everything but Danzig. It was a fun week or so on reddit as everyone was posting their Danzig Roulette purchases.
🤣 that's awesome
Thank you. Just … thank you.
You're welcome!
This was amazing. Thank you for taking me back the the amazing 90s. Incredibly done my friend.
Now, please do the music video for WISH by NIN. 🤘🏻
Glad you enjoyed it! I'm definitely thinking about turning this into a series. Compiling a list of possible candidates.😆
This was amazing. Thank you for taking me back to the amazing 90s. Incredibly done my friend.
Now, please do the music video for WISH by NIN. 🤘🏻
What I've always loved about him is he chose this kick-ass, sort of German death metal last name, but kept "Glenn".
🤣🤣🤣 exactly
Thank you for highlighting something seriously missing from today's crappy pop music...doses of mayhem, unruliness and moshing.
Saw Samhain sometime in the early to mid-80s at the kennel Club in Philly with maybe 40 other people. So much batter than what followed. Sorry you missed it.
I also loved Danzig so much in my Early 20s I did everything I could to look like him.
The sideburns the weights the lot.
This is so awesome
I also restack ed your article with pictures
Thanks so much! 🤘🏻
I had a friend who had that on a taped tape in NZ 1994. He listened to it till it wore out.
I was allowed one listen.
Epic! Thank you for this tremendous effort! All those memories came flooding back to me. This may be one of the best songs of the 90s, definitely one of the greatest vocals of the era, nd complete with that killer guitar riff I didn't appreciate enough back then.
Love every word of this....EXCEPT for when you state that Glenn is 5'3". Not cool, man. Not cool at all. It's obvious to anyone witnessing this magic that Glenn is a seven-footer, with a cosmic radius stretching to the heavens. I just hope Glenn forgives you for this grave error.
So glad you enjoyed it! I had so much fun writing it, huge nostalgia trip. Also a deep vein to mine. I actually cut jokes, there was so much to say.
I frankly was shocked to discover Glenn is so short. Wouldn't have known if not for people on Notes making jokes about his height. He absolutely projects as a big dude. Must be his stage presence talking.
The director and cinematographer deserve some accolades too. Those shots make Glenn even more epic.
This poignant piece of poetic WTF?! inspired me…to write an article about a painfully tragic frustratingly long battle with my parents, from my own adolescence, that nearly ruined my entire life (which at 14 years of age, is like, literally what it felt like.)
When they surreptitiously installed a complex 4 digit code system that blocked my sister and me from accessing the ONLY channel worth watching from our family’s extremely expansive, (I can only assume) expensive, home cable television package that had SO many other stupid and shitty channels that we were welcome to watch…and the there was a silent war that we fought against the enemy for years on behalf of our love for sex, drugs, and rock n roll. No…
We just wanted our MTV.
I remember those blockers but don't remember it being wielded against us. My dad just told us to go outside until dinner 😂
MTV was the greatest, most essential thing when I was a teenager. Sorry you were so cruelly denied!
It was so cruel…so unfair…why us, God?
Oh, of all the horrific crimes people have done to millions upon millions of children worldwide……. I can think of nothing worse.
Maybe not quite as bad but... when we were kids my dad got us an Atari and a small TV we could play it on, but never actually let us play it.
I shouldn't say never. I think we got to turn it on for our birthday and maybe even Christmas. Which is why we started playing when they weren't home. Honestly they brought it on themselves.
Not only that, but I no longer care about the blatant lies or awful threats they have made against me.
What are they going to do to me, really?
They’re 80 year old children. One will scream in vain and the other will remain tone deaf until death they shall part.
I won’t be around to watch the impending implosion, as they’ve already ripped apart pieces my soul that need substantial time away to heal and return to me as a new iteration of my next chapter.
I wonder what it will be about…
A True Christmas Story of 2024
(Evil Stepmother Edition)
All she did was read the Bible all day and scream at my hearing impaired Dad (who I don’t believe is legitimately hearing impaired) and he ignores her and does whatever he wants anyway. He actually left on Christmas Day to just get away from her. And he hates me for being born. So, he bounced without even a word. I was alone with it.
She does enjoy condemning everyone to Hell. I have been there forever, and it’s lovely this time of year.
But, when she condemned the grandkids there, too? One for “Living the gay lifestyle” and another for “Living in sin” - while simultaneously screaming JESUS in my face?!
At that moment - I couldn’t resist telling her I just sent more money to my favorite causes: Planned Parenthood and the ACLU. I had nothing to lose because I was never returning to this HELL ever again.
She snarled…and smugly told me that I deserved every awful thing that was coming my way. That I was a baby murdering defender of the “trans freaks.” My pulse rate quickened…. And then…She GOT PROPHETICALLY LOUD:
HER Bible says that Palestinian-born children MUST DIE for God chose Israel 🇮🇱!!!
I frantically scanned for the closest exit…
SHE then looked up at the ceiling, in what I believe was a state of euphoria, and (praying audibly?!) Yelled to no one in particular: “God Bless You President Trump! Lead us in the final battle against this evil beast that is The Whore of Babylon as she is sitting before me.”
And, that was my last Christmas 🎄 present to myself. I bolted like Usain to the front door, sweating like a whore in perimenopause, and started my German car (I did not know that a 4th Reich was actually going to be a “thing” when I bought it in 2022), and drove far away.
The End.
Yikes! Holy cow, this is so awful. You definitely "win" the worst stepmother award. And terrible dad too. Glad you are free of such negativity! Isn't it so freeing?
What kind of blatantly selfish, arrogant, pieces of shit parents did we have? I am outraged the anguish you and your brother endured - except on Christmas and your birthdays. 🎉
I remember our Atari. Kaboom? 💥 Wasn’t that the game that you moved the joystick from left to right in order to stop the bombs from exploding?
Talk about the 80’s, right? Hey, Russia might obliterate the US by way of Nuclear Holocaust. Let’s capitalize on that fear so Eric’s parents can have fun.
Dude! Kaboom was our jam. Favorite game to play hands down.
My Mom and stepdad are cool. Dad and stepmom were the problems. Eventually I realized I don't have to put up with it anymore, so I don't. Life's so much better now!
Kaboom 💥 to not having to do dysfunctional parent duty anymore! I dropped Dad and Evil Stepmother late last year and they might still be alive today. I wouldn’t know.
Because I don’t care either way.
It’s just that I finally embraced apathetic instead of pretending it’s all copacetic. Kaboom 💥
The evil stepmother trope is true! 🫠
Primal Gen X tapping here. Xennials too as you say. Ahh the memories. My sister and I used to play MTV all day, VHS tape in, hitting record as every new video began. If it was a banger, we kept it in the compilation. If not, we rewound and waited for the next video. Getting the world premier of November Rain and Pull Me Under by Dream Theater just after Jump by Kriss Kross? Yes please. Those tapes still exist. It was my older sister who introduced me to Danzig via this video. I absolutely had to watch, she explained, cuz, and I'm quoting here: "ohmygod he is so freaking hot." I knew then and there I would never be an alpha male. And for the next few years, every time this song played anywhere, my best friend would scream the wrong words. To this day I don't think he knows that Glenn is gonna show her "my world" because said friend was always too busy screaming "power!!" during that line instead. Good times. God we're old.